If you are a Leo woman and your man cheated on you, rest assured that I know you are going through a tough time.
However, to help you, I need to lay out some uncomfortable truths.
To truly recover from the past heartache of infidelity, you need to appreciate and recognize things for what they really are instead of what you hope things should be.
Leo people can engage in all sorts of self-deception.
After all, a key part of the Leo personality is to play off the internal turmoil of deep and profound sense of insecurity and inadequacy with a projected show of confidence and competence.
You feel that if enough people respect you, then you can truly turn into that person that they respect.
In other words, you become addicted to external validation so you can plug that gaping hole in your emotional constitution.
As you can probably tell, this is not a winning strategy.
There is nobody out there that can give you what you are missing unless you step up and supply it yourself.
Unfortunately, Leos are very stubborn. It takes them a long time to realize this fundamental question.
This is why they go through all sorts of heartaches, all sorts of personal defeat and depression before they can make progress. This all comes to a head when it comes to infidelity.
If your partner cheated on you, it is very easy for you to tell yourself all sorts of stories so you can get the kind of emotional confidence that you need to decide.
Nine times out of ten, the decision is the wrong one.
If you are serious about giving your partner a second chance, you need to pay attention to the following factors.
Forget about doing things the way you normally do things because I am telling you right now you probably will end up in the wrong place.
Not All Cheaters are the Same
People are unfaithful for a wide variety of reasons. You might think that your partner cheated on you because they do not love you.
You might think that your partner chose to sleep with another woman because they found something wrong with you.
This is not necessarily the case. You have to remember that men cheat for a wide variety of reasons.
You are not doing yourself any big favors if you lump all guys with the same motivation.
It is not all about lovemaking. It is not all about the sense of conquest. It is not all about them rejecting you.
You should focus on talking to your ex-partner clearly, so you can get the real reason.
Do not just automatically assume the worst. Do not just automatically supply a reason for his cheating behavior.
The real reason might blow you away. The real reason might come out of left field.
What is important is you need to get him to honestly communicate the real reason to you.
Understand Your Reasons for Wanting to Forgive Your Partner
You have to be very honest with yourself as to why you want to give your partner a second chance upon breaking up. There are some things you need not to do after a breakup.
I am not saying that he does not deserve a second chance. What I am saying is that you need to be clear regarding your motivations.
Many women end up destroying themselves emotionally by accepting a harmful and toxic partner.
Why? They are forgiving the person for purely selfish reasons.
In many cases, they are forgiving a cheating partner out of fear. Fear is never a good reason. Feeling desperate is never a good reason.
If you are afraid of dying alone, that is not a good reason. Why?
You are simply positioning yourself to get irreparably emotionally harmed by giving the wrong person a second chance.
If this person hurt you because of his infidelity, you have to take pause as to what your motivations are.
Are you driven by fear? Are you driven by desperation? Are you driven by a false sense of pride?
Be clear as to what is motivating you for wanting to forgive your partner.
In many cases, you might actually want to forgive him, so you can get back at him. That is right.
You are actually motivated by revenge.
By being clear as to what your mental, emotional and spiritual state is, you can zero in on the proper motives.
Forgiveness requires certain pure motives.
It is never driven by greed. It is never driven by selfishness. It is definitely not driven by a need to take revenge.
Insist on Repentance
If somebody hurt you, the very least that you can insist from that person is a changed heart and remorse.
In other words, your partner must really be sorry that he hurt you. I know that it is very easy for people to make up all sorts of excuses, so they do not get damaged emotionally.
You might have a tough and thick emotional skin, but if you are really honest with yourself, what your ex-partner did truly hurt you.
This is why you need to insist on repentance. At the very least, he has to be sincerely sorry that he hurt you.
If he is not sorry, it means he does not respect you. It means he does not value you enough.
If he does not value you enough, what makes you think that he can love you?
I hope you see how respect and love are intertwined.
Insist on a Change of Character
Before taking in your ex-partner, you need to insist that he has changed.
He has to change emotionally. He has to change in how he processes external signals.
You have to remember that external change is only possible if internal change is there.
However, it is very hard to recognize or even see internal change. We only have external change as our guide.
This is why if you insist on change of character, this change of character must be visible.
He must do things differently now. He must say different things. He must act differently.
If you detect some sort of lying, then run away from him. Do not give him the time of day.
Nine times out of ten, if he feels like he is just putting on a show just to get you back, then your relationship is headed for the rocks.
I do not see a happy ending for what is going on.
Contents
About the author
What do you think?
Lets login and you can leave your thoughts
Login with Facebook and add your comment